Last year in so many ways, was wonderful for Neil and I. Many of the reasons are listed in previous blogs. Despite the death of three loved ones, lockdowns, homeschooling, limited work, quarantine and the like, we have been so blessed.
But, just before Christmas I had not been feeling the best. I had been coughing my brains out for weeks on end, and had to resort to using an inhaler – something I only used about once a year now. I finally went to the Doctor, and came out with the diagnosis of some weird disease. Not anything that will kill me, but something that got me used to new words, like ‘sphincter’ – which by the way you should never look up online without the word ‘oesophagal’ in front of it 🙂
He stuck me on medication and told me that he will need to see me in about six weeks time. That time is approaching. He told me not to make any changes, just let the medication do it’s thing, and if my original symptoms decrease, then this will need a drastic diet overhaul.
So, like a diligent wee soldier who cannot stand taking medications, I have done so and prayed along the way. The symptoms have indeed decreased, and I know what the near future will bring. However, I wasn’t prepared for the side affects: the need for an inhaler, and quite severe breathlessness at times. Normal walking and exercising started to be quite traumatic after that first pill. Restriction across my chest, heart palpitations and panic attacks. The simplest of things becoming a bit much. Bursting into tears. Utter STRESS! My hope and prayer is that things come right after finishing the meds.
Well. I have been online and looked at what needs to be done, and rather than wait, I wanted to get moving now that the festive season has left us. Cutting out wine, coffee and tea – have you ever experienced caffeine withdrawals? Argh!! Next comes the hard part: half the vegetables I have grown in my garden, are now deemed not good for me! That’s just plain rude. Still, I am cutting back the ‘bad’ ones and starting to introduce the ‘good’ ones.
I am not sad, worried or scared. What I am, is utterly relieved – and slightly ashamed. I had been praying and asking God to guide me. I had put on weight and felt deathly ashamed of myself and was having all sorts of issues that weren’t the norm for me. And that in and of itself, is something that I think needs to be addressed here: I am the first to put up my hand and say I have enjoyed the unhealthy foods this year, just a bit too much. They have taken their toll and now I am having to dial back things in order to regain my health. I just wish we would see gluttony for the sin that it really is. I now am…
I have been before the Lord in repentance, and have reinstated the prayer I included in the back of the original copy of Mirabelle. It seems, it was entirely prophetic, writing a prayer of thanksgiving for our bodies. I have spoken with my family, prayed with my husband, and actually apologised to my body. Our bodies DO have a voice – it is the voice of flesh, and Yeshua has provided a way of healing and wholeness through His shed blood and broken body, too. We are not powerless and left alone. We are full of the authority and power of Yeshua, if only we would tap into it and use it.
And so, I am learning something new this year. I am learning to take better care of me. There have been other deep emotional reasons that have aided and abetted in this journey, and they are being addressed too, but I certainly am feeling optimistic and excited about this jolly diagnosis!
Happiest 2021 to all of you!